Cheekisms

So, being a youngest child with a 14 year old older sibling may cause you to have “only child syndrome” because it is like you were an only child. Not by numbers, but by practice. As in, when you’re born, your older sibling is not really “child” age anymore. I know this all too well as I have an older sibling who is ALSO 14 years older than me (funny enough, she’s the mother of the two kids who share this age gap.)

So… Nephew Cheeks is 5. He’s selfish. Stingy (pronounced: stan-jee).

Exhibit A:

Nephew Cheeks is playing with a toy.

I grab an errant toy that he basically forgot he even still has.

He spots me with the toy.

He runs over to grab said toy away from me and puts it beside him.

Just to eff with him, I grab another toy.

He spots that as well and takes it from me with a whine and places it next to him.

We keep this bagginfoaf going until he has a HUGE pile of toys next to him… toys of which, he doesn’t even wanna really play with and truly can’t play with them all at once because he’s not a mutant.

Exhibit B:

Nephew Cheeks is watching le TV and has a toy next to him. An ignored toy.

I grab the toy and fiddle with the buttons.

He hears the sounds and snatches it away from me with a whine, fiddles a bit with it himself and then sets it aside.

I take the toy again.

He snatches it back and moves it a bit further away from me.

I reach over to take it again.

He then snatches it with wild abandon and — I kid you not — shoves it under the couch so that none of us can have it.

He is seriously the funniest person I know. Not kid. PERSON. And I know a ton of hilarious peoples.